Ayyyyy, I made it through two weeks! Crayzeee. It feels like much longer. I have had a million bajillion emotions throughout the week, but now that I´m at this point I almost feel nothing? It´s hard to say. My email time is SUPER limited, so I´m just going to write this email, attach pictures and probably just print off your emails and read them later today. Time FLIES by on the computers, and there are just too many people and not enough computers.
Last P-day: Last Thursday was the bomb. It went by so fast though, obviously, because time moves much more quickly when you can just chill out and do whatever you want. I took a tiny nap, read your emails, played volleyball, etc. It was a pretty good time. I pretty much live every day for p-day #pathetic
Spanish: Spanish is a literal mind trip. I don´t know it, it´s mentally EXHAUSTING to try to understand it and speak in it, and I just can´t even fathom it ever coming easily to me. I mean I know more now than I did when I came (obvio), but it´s just SO tiring. When we speak in English again after speaking in Spanish, it feels like coming home or something haha. Sundays are our only day in English during the morning and afternoon, and it´s the greatest thing on this planet. English is the bomb. I really do love the Spanish language, but it´s just a straight up struggle at this point. Mostly it´s a little more miserable than I thought it was going to be. Mad props to any missionary serving in any country where they have to learn any language... When I think about serving in Asia or something right now I practically start to cry tears of gratitude that I´m not in that situation. I think Heavenly Father knew I couldn´t handle it haha. But for realz. But it´s coming along fine, and I think things will be better once I´m out of the CCM.
Food: I have found out a system that kind of works for me (kind of). They have cream cheese at breakfast and plain bread at every meal, so I just stock up on cream cheese in the morning (and take it in my bag, which is techincally against the rules #fubeca (that means disobedient in Portuguese), and then I eat bread and cheese for every meal. Haha I probably won´t literally die from that since I´m only here for 6 weeks, so that´s chill. Also sometimes I eat cereal for breakfast or random other things they have for lunch and dinner if there´s not too much meat. I´m surviving. It´s better this week than it was last week :)
This coming Saturday: We get to actually leave the CCM and go proselyting on the streets of Buenos Aires. Which is a literal joke, because we know like NO Spanish! hahahaha. It´s going to be an interesting experience. But this past week the North Americans that are two weeks ahead of us went, and two girls almost got robbed. So I have that to look forward to! Get hyped!
Sunday: So every Sunday we all have to prepare a talk based on a topic they provide us (this week was faith), and then they call randomly on 6 people to give talks in Sacrament meeting. So I was chosen, which I was actually ok with, on account of faith is a great topic. I had prepared some thoughts, but not much more, so I pretty much just winged it. I was kind of nervous, but it´s obviously one of my life goals to just be able to speak by the spirit, so this was a good opportunity to start practicing! It went well, and I felt pretty good about it. Also, like I said, Sundays are all in English, so I could actually say what I wanted to! Being able to express yourself is the bomb. The rest of Sunday was really good too, and we got to take pictures at the temple because the entire group of Latinos that was here was leaving because they only stay for two weeks. I´ll include those pictures in my email. I can only attach two at a time though (sry), so I´m going to send like 10 emails haha. Get ready.
Leaving group: So like I said, the entire group of Latinos that arrived when we did left this past Tuesday. It was way sad and a straight bummer. We had spent a lot of our emotional energy becoming friends with them, and now they´re all gone and we have to start completely again. More arrived last night and more are coming today, so that´ll be interesting. Our latina roommates that woke up every day at like 5:45 left though, so tbh I´m actually kind of grateful for that... Our new ones talk in Spanish SO FAST though, and they seem a little cray... We´ll see...
CCM breakdown: So I found out who gets sent to the Argentina MTC and why. Apparently all the Brazilians who get sent to Spanish speaking missions come here. So that´s why there are so many Brazilians! We got more last night. They are pretty much the greatest. I´m a big fan. Portuguese is crazy though!! But most of them speak at least a little bit of English and Spanish already. Also, Brazilians sing hymns SO LOUD, and it´s awesome. They are just so passionate! Then all the North Americans who serve in Paraguay or Uruguay come here, all the Canadians serving in Argentina, and then just random other South Americans serving in Argentina or a few other countries.
Trio dynamic: So not going to lie, my companionship situation has gotten a little more rough. It´s almost always hard to be in groups of three, and this is no exception. My companions are probably more similar to each other than they are to me, and we are just REALLY different in a LOT of ways. I´m constantly praying for Heavenly Father to help me though, and I feel like I´ll be ok.
My thoughts: So my feelings have been acting kind of weird this week, at least more than last week... I have just had more moments of angst and not knowing what to do with myself haha. It´s just been really hard for me to not have anyone here that knows me or really even cares to know me. I can feel myself withdrawing a little bit, and I just don´t really know what to do with all my thoughts and feelings, on account of I have no one to talk to. My favorite parts of the day are writing in my journal at night and praying because they´re the only times I actually feel like I get the chance to express myself. It´s been cool because I feel like I´ve become closer to Christ, but it´s kind of rough, because that relationship is pretty much the ONLY one I have. Mostly I´m ok if I don´t think too much about the future, but sometimes I just feel overwhelmed on account of it´s hard not to think about the future... I know I´ll be fine though, and I just keep praying to feel comfort and peace and the strength to keep going. Legit every minute of every day I pray "Lord I believe, help thou my unbelief." I´m not even kidding.
Ok, well I sent like a million pictures, so hopefully that helps you get a feel for the people I´m with. Sorry I don´t have time to write more. I wish I could write for hours, because I feel so much better being able to express myself. Love you all dearly! I pray for you every day and hope you all receive the choicest blessings! T-3 weeks until Baby Ray meets her eternal companion, I just know it ;)
I love you so much!!!!!!!!!!!
p.s. I´m getting pretty tan here, ayyyy. My tan lines are pretty ratchet though... As I´m sure you can imagine. I´ll probz be brown when I come home. Stoke!
p.p.s. D and C 84:80-85, 88